Posts Tagged ‘Chuck Norris’

Chuck Norris To Save America From Darkness If Obama Reelected

Chuck NorrisThis week, “Walker, Texas Ranger” star Chuck Norris released a television ad with his wife, warning Americans of the dangers of reelecting Barack Obama. In the TV spot, Norris’s wife Gena warned us that reelecting Obama would be a “triumph of evil” and will send us into “a thousand years of darkness.” Today Norris announced that should Obama be reelected, he would personally take it upon himself to protect American from the coming apocalypse.

BS Gossip asked Norris how Obama’s reelection would create an apocalyptic America that we’d need saving from. He said, “If he’s reelected, his Muslims friends from Kenya will obviously take over the country. People won’t be able to protect themselves because he’ll have taken away all of our guns. Then the sun will explode, fire will rain from the sky and Satin himself will rise upon the Earth. Good thing I’m planning to stick around huh?” We asked him how Obama’s reelection would cause all of that to happen. He yelled at us and said, “You know! Taxing the rich and socialism! That’s just baiting the devil, don’t you think?”

When we asked the 72-year-old actor how he would personally save America from the apocalypse, he said, “I’m friggin’ Chuck Norris! Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell stories about me! I have a grizzly bear rug Read the rest of this entry »