Romney: A Vote for Obama is a Vote Against Breaking Bad

Romney and ObamaAs Mitt Romney slides in the polls, he has changed the political narrative from the economy to popular TV shows. This morning, the Republican leader told customers at an Arizona IHOP that if Barack Obama is reelected, TV shows like Breaking Bad might never make it to the air.

The popular AMC TV show “Breaking Bad” follows physics teacher Walter White, who is diagnosed with cancer. When his healthcare bill isn’t covered, he turns to a life of selling meth. Romney told the crowd that had Obama been President at the time “Breaking Bad” was created, Walter’s hospital bills would have been covered by Obamacare. “There would be no need for Walter to turn to crime since his bills would be covered and the show we all love would never have existed!” Romney went on to suggest some potentially fantastic TV shows may never be created due to Obama’s failed policies.

Obama didn’t take this suggestion lying down. The President responded by saying, “Romney is obviously not a real fan of the show. Otherwise, he would know that Walter White didn’t just turn to a life of crime to pay his hospital bills but also to raise money for his family in case he succumbed to the cancer. So saying my health care plan would have killed ‘Breaking Bad’ is ridiculous. Nice try Mitt, but the American people are smarter than you think. I guarantee that if I’m reelected, there will no shortage of terrific TV shows created.”

After hearing the President’s response, Romney, took the fight a step further. “It’s funny hearing the President say his policy wouldn’t affect great TV shows from being created. This is a President that supports abortion. If he was president in the late 60s, the mother of the ‘Breaking Bad’ creator, Vince Gilligan, could have chosen to have an abortion and then Vince would never have a chance to share his creative visions with us. Who knows what other famous filmmakers, musicians and athletes would have been aborted under an Obama administration. We could be living in a world without Steven Spielberg, The Beatles and Wayne Gretsky. Nice job Mr. President… you murdered Wayne Gretsky!”

BS Gossip asked Barack Obama if he would be resigning from the race for murdering Wayne Gretsky in an alternative hypothetical reality. Obama told us that this discussion was getting silly and suggested we talk about something relevant the American public could relate to, like the alternative hypothetical reality where the middle class get so few tax breaks, they can’t afford to have as many children. The President said, “In this alternative hypothetical reality, the parents of Michael Jackson might have only been able to afford to have two children and Michael would never have been born. We’d be stuck with a Jackson Two! So why don’t we ask Mitt how he feels being responsible for tax policies that could have prevented talent like Michael Jackson, Mickey Mantle and Clint Eastwood from being born.” With a smirk he added, “Thinking about it, Mitt would probably be alright with erasing Clint Eastwood from existence.”

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